written by Me & Kamal Krishna
images source: www.sitasingstheblues.com
Ram & Sita
The most ideal couple ever.
Is that possible if they lived in this era?
Lets check.
*Note: please don’t go judgmental and sentimental over the fact that am using the characters of the ‘Holy’ Ramayana for this skit. If you don’t get the point… just get married. (I mean go to hell!)
As a matter of fact Ram & Sita approved this, and you may go check with them if in doubt!
"Learning from his father's mistakes.. Ram married one Woman.
and.. witnessing Ram's mistakes.. Hanuman remained a Bachelor!!!"
lets see why....
Ram is in a party with his friends.. lakshmana, sugriva, vibheeshana and hanuman along with all the vanaras were in there. They were all drunk till their throats and were having a ball. It’s a typical guys party with lots of monkeying and embarrassing (fun) moments.
That’s how guys go wild and that’s what a party is!
Suddenly ram gets a 'Missed Call' on his mobile.
He is sobered back to two pegs.. because he knows what a single ring means.
He quietly looks at the screen and puts it aside.
Now that’s a no ordinary missed call.. its an intentional single ring. That single ring actually means “Enough fun for the day, come back home. Or else u know the consequences”.
Hanuman couldn't control his laughter at Ram's Miserabliity..
with a smirk says
"...so guys recent research reveals that using mobile phone is unhealthy, not because of radiation but because of the Dictation of Regulation and permission by the Woman! "
Everyone burst into laughter.. not for the joke alone but for Ram's situation.
Rama has no choice but to rush back home. Since he is THE husband.
He has to leave. It doesn’t matter what his friends think of him, whether its a Party Etiquette or not… even if they r gonna call him henpecked!
He needs to go back home. DOT
Back at home. Sita is really mad and she doesn’t look like she’s gonna make any conversation. It even doesn’t look like she is the one who called him back home.
Now Ram has two choices.
1. Silently with a guilt face he can go and sleep.
2. Silently with a puppy face go to sita and fix things.
He can’t opt 1. Because that may lead to bigger disasters. So to make it simple (that’s what he hopes) he resorts to option 2.
Sita: How come u are back so early? are you done partying with ur monkey friends?
Ram: thinks In his mind “but its actually you who called me back, else the plan was to party till 5am.” But wont dare to say that. Instead he says “c’mon hun its just a small get-together we were having, and its not really late its just 11pm.”
Sita: ya right, its always those drunkards who come first. U must have forgotten that u have a wife at home and she is waiting for you.
Ram: no babe its not like that, they are my friends and they are part of my life too… u know its not everyday that we party.
Sita: ya right! u wud drink everyday if u were allowed.
(Allowed? No one knows when such authority was given to her to dictate the ‘lord’ rama. What actually was given to her is the “respect”. Which is not recognized and instead being misused.)
Ram; hun, its not about drinking. It’s actually about having fun with friends involving alcohol. Its socializing.
(Now sita can never understand that difference. Because she is not a guy and she can never know how fun that could be.)
Sita: Socializing? U are having enough of that on facebook and twitter already.
(And then follows the “brahma astra”. Yes along with the authority sita has seized the astra’s too. )
“You go to work in the morning and come back in the evening.
Then u are glued to that tv, mobile or the computer. Dont u ever think of spending time with ur wife?”
Now this “brahma astra“ is always followed by an argument, just for the heck of winning.
These questions have been answered very long back, but those answers were never accepted. In fact these questions were never meant to have answers.
Going to work in the morning and coming back is not an option unless u are working in a night shift customer care company. And that’s what brings food to the table.
After a day long work, don’t u deserve some entertainment?
“Spending time with wife” now some one please define that. Does that mean staring eye to eye for the rest of the evening?
Husband's are labelled 'Selfish' because they would like to spend some fun time with rest of the people in their life.
Well if that's selfish what do you call a wife who cannot tolerate her husband going out of the house unless its for Earning for her shopping?
So going back to the 'situation' we have.. Sita is currently asking Rama, the 73rd Question (which also has no logical answer) regarding why Rama cannot have his own moment or space and how demeaning that is to the WIFE.
While the questionnaire is happening Sita notices that ram is actually smiling looking at his phone.
She quickly grabs the phone and realizes that its a forward joke from hanuman
" Once upon a time a man is meditating in the woods for ages,
Finally when god appears and asks what he wishes for.
The man wishes to become a bachelor again.
That's when god gets a missed call on his mobile..
God immediately picks up the phone holds on to his ear
and quickly returns to the skies without turning back.
Moral of the story is: So there's no help for the HUSBAND!"
Sita's eruption of anger is inexpressible.
"So this is what u guys do in the party's.. you insult women and have a laugh over it????
Am here screaming for the past 50minutes.. and you aren't even paying attention??"
Then sita gets a call on her mobile.. (Oh yes she is allowed to use her phone in-between arguments, u wanna differ with her?)
Its lakshmana's wife calling
"Dear is your husband back home? because mine is still out there and not picking my calls,
Sita: Oh yes he is back, and you should actually put your foot down and.... blah blah blah..
and you know what happened today? blah blah blah blah... blah blah blah blah... blah blah blah blah... "
and the phone call goes on... you know how cheap the call rates are these days..
and how long women actually speak on phones!
and so ram is actually rescued...... Today!
He can slowly fall into sleep and call it a day.
He needs that much of rest,
because tomorrow is another day..
with another dispute..
and an other doubt!
with another grief
in the happily married life!
.... never ending!
